The 4 Ways Spending Money Can Make You Happier and the One Way That Won't

I recently listened to George Kamel interview Arthur Brooks, a Harvard professor who studies happiness. Brooks said there are really only five things we can do with money: buy things, buy experiences, buy time, give it away, or save it. According to him, four of those can contribute to genuine happiness. The one that usually does not last is buying more things.

That immediately caught my attention because, for a long time, I thought buying things did make me happy.

Maybe part of that is because gift-giving is one of my love languages. I love finding the perfect gift for someone, and I also love beautiful clothes, shoes, home decor, and the little thrill of a package arriving at the door. Retail therapy works for a moment. The problem is that the feeling is incredibly short-lived. The dress eventually becomes another dress in my closet, and the decorative object becomes another thing I have to dust.

It was not until I met Nick, who would almost always choose travel and experiences over more things, that I began to understand the difference between a temporary rush and happiness that stays with you.

1. Buy Experiences

Some of the money I am happiest we have spent has gone toward travel, family outings, date nights, camps for Greyson, dinners with friends, and time together away from our normal routines.

Nick helped me see that experiences give us more than one happy moment. We look forward to them, enjoy them while they are happening, and continue talking about them afterward.

I love watching Greyson discover a new place, try a new activity, or ask a thousand questions about something he has never seen before. I am glad we spend money traveling with him. I am also glad when we spend it on something as simple as a babysitter and dinner out, a fun lunch together, or an afternoon doing something he loves.

A new handbag might make me happy when I buy it. A family trip can become part of our story.

2. Buy Back Your Time

This may be the category I appreciate most during this season of life.

I used to wonder why a stay-at-home mom would need a house cleaner or pay someone else to handle household services. I thought, if you stay home, isn't that part of the job?

I totally get it now.

Staying home does not mean sitting around with unlimited time. It means managing school communication, appointments, errands, meals, pets, volunteering, household projects, summer schedules, birthday gifts, repairs, and hundreds of tiny details no one notices until they are forgotten.

I am very grateful we have help cleaning our house. Yes, I am capable of cleaning it myself. But those hours can instead be spent with Greyson, working on my blog, volunteering, exercising, seeing a friend, resting, or pursuing something meaningful.

Now that I am considering some new business opportunities, more to come on that later, a laundry service is sounding better and better.

Laundry is the household task I enjoy the least, and it never stops. The moment the final load is folded, someone changes clothes. There are always towels, sheets, pajamas, swimsuits, uniforms, and one random sock that belongs to nobody.

Paying for laundry service would not simply be paying someone to wash our clothes. It would be buying several hours of my life back every week. And that matters.

3. Give It Away

Some of the spending that brings me the most happiness is not for me at all.

I am glad when we give to our church, support a rescue organization, tip someone generously, buy lunch for a friend, deliver a meal, or send a gift that lets someone know we were thinking about them.

This is where my love of gift-giving becomes something deeper than shopping. Finding a thoughtful gift for someone I love feels completely different from wandering through a store hoping something will improve my mood.

Generosity lasts longer because it creates connection. It allows money to become a way of saying, I see you. I appreciate you. You matter to me.

4. Save It

Saving may not sound as exciting as a vacation or as immediately satisfying as giving someone a gift, but it offers something incredibly valuable: peace.

Savings provide breathing room when something breaks, plans change, or an unexpected expense appears. They also give us the freedom to make decisions based on what is right for our family instead of reacting entirely out of fear.

I am learning that not spending money can sometimes bring more happiness than spending it. There is comfort in knowing we are preparing for the future, stewarding our resources carefully, and not allowing every passing desire to become a purchase.

Buying Time Also Reduces the Mental Load

Buying time is not only about removing physical work. It can also mean removing some of the mental load.

Mothers do not merely complete tasks. We notice what needs to be done, decide when it should happen, determine who will do it, remember to follow up, and then check that it actually happened.

That is why I am intrigued by home and family manager companies. These services can coordinate repairs, schedule appointments, oversee vendors, organize projects, run errands, and keep track of the endless details required to manage a household.

There was a time when I might have considered that excessive. Now, having someone help close a few of the tabs constantly running in my brain sounds brilliant.

Sometimes the greatest luxury is not owning something expensive. It is no longer being the only person who remembers everything.

What My Faith Is Teaching Me About Money

My Christian faith reminds me that money itself is neither the source of my happiness nor something I should feel guilty for enjoying. It is a resource God has entrusted to us.

Jesus said, for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. That verse makes me stop and consider what my spending reveals about what I value.

Does our money create time for the people God has given us? Does it allow us to serve and encourage others? Does it help us care responsibly for our family? Does it support experiences that strengthen our relationships? Or am I buying something because I am stressed, comparing myself to someone else, or looking for a feeling only God can provide?

There is nothing wrong with enjoying beautiful things. I certainly still do. But I am learning not to ask a purchase to give me peace, identity, contentment, or purpose. It cannot carry that weight.

For another mother, buying back time might mean hiring a cleaner once a month, ordering groceries, paying a teenager to help with yardwork, using a meal service during a difficult season, or arranging childcare for a few quiet hours. Giving might mean covering a friend's coffee. An experience might be a family picnic, museum membership, or simple weekend getaway. Saving might begin with a very small automatic transfer.

The lesson is not that we all need to spend money in the same ways. It is that we should spend intentionally on the life God has actually called us to live.

I still enjoy a package on the porch. But these days, a meaningful trip, a generous gift, money in savings, or a basket of clean laundry I did not have to fold sounds a whole lot more like happiness.